So because my employer is evil and sadistic, we can no longer access Pandora at work. Gmail, Gchat, Myspace, Facebook – all fine, clearly motivating us to take pricing strategies to a new level…but listening to music – that will take us right to Obama’s feet, begging for a bailout. Absurd, right? Clearly it’s better and more productive for us to hear our cube neighbor fighting with his wife over who is picking up the takeout (he loses a disproportionate number of times I must say) or to get the complete play-by-play on our well-fed secretary’s recent “first date” with her ex-husband (yes, the logic there confuses me as well. Due to the risk of hearing more about the bedroom activities, I chose not to ask further questions) than to peacefully listen to our Bangin 90s mix on Pandora.
This cruel twist of fate led me and most of residents of the 11th floor cube farm to Jango. Jango is similar to Pandora, except that it doesn’t work as well. For instance, I chose Bruce Springsteen as my channel artist and got ABBA. Now, I love my Mamma Mia as much as anyone, but I really don’t see the correlation. Jango also introduced me to the song “I Hope Heaven has Myspace.” Their next hit single is entitled “I Wish My Work had Pandora So I Wouldn’t Have to Hear Crap like ‘I Hope Heaven Has Myspace.’” (Their record label TOLD them to shorten the title length – no dice). So after weeks of tinkering, I finally got a channel that generally plays enjoyable songs. I say generally with some emphasis, as it led to Rod Stewart’s “Reason to Believe”. While trying to decide whether I should be embarrassed to know the words to (and almost enjoy) this song, I took a quick look at the cover art for the song and nearly died.
This cruel twist of fate led me and most of residents of the 11th floor cube farm to Jango. Jango is similar to Pandora, except that it doesn’t work as well. For instance, I chose Bruce Springsteen as my channel artist and got ABBA. Now, I love my Mamma Mia as much as anyone, but I really don’t see the correlation. Jango also introduced me to the song “I Hope Heaven has Myspace.” Their next hit single is entitled “I Wish My Work had Pandora So I Wouldn’t Have to Hear Crap like ‘I Hope Heaven Has Myspace.’” (Their record label TOLD them to shorten the title length – no dice). So after weeks of tinkering, I finally got a channel that generally plays enjoyable songs. I say generally with some emphasis, as it led to Rod Stewart’s “Reason to Believe”. While trying to decide whether I should be embarrassed to know the words to (and almost enjoy) this song, I took a quick look at the cover art for the song and nearly died.
Really? That was the best picture he could come up with? Thinking that surely there was something better out there, and that maybe this was a joke, I Googled it[1]. I had no idea what a treasure trove of images there were. I also did not know it was possible to look SO ABSURD in every single one. Seriously. If the striped speedo with matching tank top weren’t enough, the massive quantities of blond hair should do it. Please, for everyone’s benefit, many of these looks should be illegal:
http://images.google.com/images?rls=gm&hl=en&q=rod+stewart&gbv=2&aq=0s&oq=rod+stwe
http://images.google.com/images?rls=gm&hl=en&q=rod+stewart&gbv=2&aq=0s&oq=rod+stwe
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